
Alcohol use disorder (AUD) is a condition that affects millions of people. It can be challenging to figure out how to help a loved one struggling with alcohol use, but there are steps you can take to support them and yourself. It's important to educate yourself on AUD, consider different ways to talk to your loved one, and make a plan for the conversation. Pick a time when they are in a good mood and not under the influence of alcohol, and emphasize that quitting drinking or drinking less is possible. You can suggest treatment options, but remember that you can't force someone to stop drinking. It's also crucial to take care of yourself while helping someone with a drinking problem, such as by joining a support group or seeing a therapist.
What You'll Learn
Educate yourself on alcohol use disorders and treatment options
Educating yourself about alcohol use disorders and treatment options is a crucial step in helping a loved one struggling with alcohol misuse. Alcohol use disorder (AUD) or alcoholism is a common medical condition where individuals are unable to stop drinking despite the negative impact on their health, safety, and relationships. The disorder can range from mild to severe, and it often co-occurs with other mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety, trauma-related disorders, and other substance use disorders. Recognizing the signs and symptoms of AUD is essential for early intervention and effective treatment.
Treatment for AUD typically involves a combination of medication and behavioral therapy. Approved medications for AUD are non-addictive options that can help reduce cravings and ease withdrawal symptoms. Naltrexone, for instance, helps reduce the urge to drink, while acamprosate makes abstinence easier by decreasing negative symptoms associated with alcohol abstinence. Additionally, disulfiram discourages drinking by causing unpleasant effects when alcohol is consumed. These medications can be used alongside behavioral therapy, which aims to change drinking behavior and address underlying issues contributing to alcohol misuse.
It is important to remember that treatment should be tailored to the individual's needs and should incorporate empathy and motivational support. Seeking treatment early is crucial, as it increases the effectiveness of intervention. As a loved one, you can play a vital role in their recovery journey by staying involved and providing support. This may include participating in couples or family counseling, making behavioral changes such as keeping alcohol out of the home, and assisting with treatment goals.
Educating yourself about AUD also involves understanding the challenges of addressing drinking problems. People with AUD may feel isolated and embarrassed due to the stigma associated with their condition. They may believe they should handle it alone or worry about negative opinions from others. Therefore, it is essential to approach conversations about their alcohol use with empathy and without judgment. Pick a calm moment when the person is not under the influence, and express your concerns using specific examples of how their drinking has affected them and others. Offer specific suggestions for seeking help, such as seeing a doctor or joining a support group, and emphasize that they are not alone in their struggle.
Additionally, self-care is important when supporting someone with AUD. It can be emotionally challenging, and you may need support as well. Consider seeking therapy or connecting with support groups to ensure you have the necessary tools to help your loved one effectively. Remember, recovery is a journey, and with treatment and your support, your loved one can take steps towards reducing their alcohol consumption or achieving abstinence.
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Pick a good time and place to talk
Picking the right time and place to talk to an alcoholic about their drinking is crucial. It is important to choose a time when the person is not drinking and is in a good mood. You should avoid talking to them first thing in the morning or when they have a hangover. It is also advisable to wait until you are both feeling calm and can focus on the conversation without distractions. Pick a quiet and private place, where you won't be interrupted, and turn off your phone and other devices.
It is also important to prepare yourself emotionally before having this conversation. It is normal to feel nervous or upset, so it is a good idea to practice what you will say beforehand. You can try writing a script or role-playing the conversation with a friend. Remember to use positive language and avoid being judgemental.
It is also worth noting that addiction is not about the quantity of alcohol consumed but the effect it has on the individual. If your friend or loved one is experiencing negative consequences related to their drinking, they may need help. Some common signs of substance abuse include a noticeable increase in drinking, periodic attempts to cut down or switch to different substances, and a change in personality when under the influence.
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Be supportive and non-judgemental
Alcoholism is a chronic disease with genetic, psychological, and environmental factors influencing its development and manifestations. It is often progressive and fatal, and is characterised by impaired control over drinking, preoccupation with alcohol, denial, and use of alcohol despite adverse consequences. It is important to be supportive and non-judgemental when talking to an alcoholic.
Firstly, educate yourself on alcoholism and recovery. Learn about potential triggers, psychological changes, enablement, the recovery process, and the health issues that addiction causes. This will help you better understand what the person is going through and why. It will also make it easier for you to relate to and assist them in their recovery.
Secondly, focus on the future and the positives ahead. Most people dealing with addiction already feel deep guilt and shame for letting themselves and others down. They are aware that their actions have negatively impacted their loved ones. Avoid placing blame or using judgmental language. Instead of calling your loved one an "addict," refer to them as someone in recovery from addiction. Try to see them as a person first and foremost, rather than a problem.
Thirdly, provide encouragement and acknowledge their milestones and efforts. Remind them that lapsing/relapsing is a normal part of the recovery process and that they should use it as a learning opportunity. Recognise how hard they have been trying and continue to offer your support. Celebrate any positive changes, no matter how small. This might include reducing their alcohol consumption, using in a safer way, or improving their overall health and lifestyle.
Finally, be patient and understanding. Cutting back or stopping alcohol use can make people feel sick, irritable, and experience low moods, anxiety, and poor sleep. Try to be compassionate while their body and mind adjust to the change. Remember that recovery looks different for everyone and can involve a variety of help and support methods.
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Suggest specific treatment options
When it comes to seeking treatment for alcohol problems, there are a variety of options available. The first step is to understand the different treatment choices and select the one that suits your needs. SAMHSA's National Helpline is a free, confidential referral service that can help individuals facing substance use disorders. They provide referrals to local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations.
Behavioral Treatments
Behavioral treatments aim to change drinking behavior through counseling. This can include licensed therapists providing evidence-based modalities such as alcohol-focused CBT, motivational enhancement, and mutual support group facilitation. The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force recommends that adults engaged in risky drinking behaviors receive brief behavioral counseling to reduce alcohol misuse.
Medication
There are currently three medications approved for Alcohol Use Disorder (AUD) in the United States: Naltrexone, Acamprosate, and Disulfiram. These medications are non-addictive and can help reduce the urge to drink, decrease negative symptoms during abstinence, and discourage drinking by causing unpleasant symptoms when alcohol is consumed. Other medications that may be beneficial include the anticonvulsants topiramate and gabapentin, which have been suggested as second-line therapies.
Mutual Support Groups
Many individuals benefit from participating in mutual support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) or secular alternatives like SMART Recovery. These groups provide ongoing assistance and support to help maintain long-term sobriety.
Inpatient and Outpatient Treatment Programs
Treatment programs can range from residential inpatient, partial hospitalization, intensive outpatient, and standard outpatient options. These programs can be tailored to meet individual needs and may include a combination of behavioral treatments and medications.
Aftercare Programs
Aftercare is an important part of the recovery process, as it provides ongoing support to prevent relapse once an individual has completed a rehabilitation program. According to SAMHSA, 84% of treatment facilities offer aftercare services, which can include continued counseling, support groups, and other resources to maintain sobriety.
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Seek support for yourself
It is important to seek support for yourself when you are trying to help someone with an alcohol problem. Dealing with an alcoholic's drinking problem can feel like an emotional rollercoaster and can take a heavy toll on your health, outlook, and well-being. It is vital that you stay safe, take care of your own health, and get the support you need.
You could begin counseling or therapy with a mental health professional to discuss and process your feelings. You might consider joining a support group for loved ones of people with alcohol use disorders, such as Al-Anon or SMART Recovery for Friends and Family. These resources can also help you learn and remember the importance of setting healthy boundaries when dealing with someone with an alcohol use disorder.
Talking to others who have been in your position can help you develop healthier strategies to protect your boundaries. It can also help you to not feel alone in this challenging situation. You can also talk to a therapist or a mental health or substance abuse specialist to advise you on how to talk to your loved one about their alcohol use. You could offer your perception of the person struggling with alcohol misuse and ask for guidance or even role-play with the therapist to work through potentially difficult responses and how you might deal with them.
You can also prepare yourself by educating yourself on alcohol use disorders, considering different ways of talking to your loved one, and making a plan for your conversation. You can also read articles, books, or websites, or access other free resources on alcohol use disorders.
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Frequently asked questions
It is important to pick a time when the person is in a good mood and not under the influence of alcohol. Avoid using outdated and stigmatizing terms such as "alcoholic" or "addict". Instead, use specific examples to show how their drinking has had consequences. You can say something like, "I'm worried about your drinking because I've noticed you've been missing work."
If the person refuses to talk, leave it for a while and give them some space. You can say, "I can see that you're not ready to talk about this yet. I'm here for you whenever you are ready." It is important to remember that you cannot force someone to stop abusing alcohol.
It is normal for the person to feel upset, worried, or guilty about their drinking. If they feel under attack, they may get defensive. Avoid using judgemental or unkind words, and try not to repeat the same argument. Instead, give them positive reinforcement when they share their feelings and acknowledge that what they are going through is difficult.
Educate yourself on alcohol use disorders and treatment options. You can suggest specific treatment options, such as seeking help from a therapist or joining a support group. Offer to do things that don't involve drinking and be available for them when they need support. Remember to also take care of yourself and seek support if needed.
It may take more than one conversation to encourage the person to seek help. You can encourage them to schedule a check-up with their doctor or work together to make a list of small, measurable goals. Remember that the earlier a person with an addiction gets help, the more effective the treatment will be.