Living With An Alcoholic Parent: Ptsd Risks And Realities

Post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD, is a mental health condition that can develop in people who have experienced a shocking, scary, or dangerous event. While many associate PTSD with veterans or survivors of sexual assault, it can also develop in people who grew up with alcoholic parents. The unpredictable behaviour of an alcoholic parent can create an unstable and traumatic environment for children, leading to complex trauma that can manifest as PTSD later in life. The impact of this trauma can affect a person's mental and emotional well-being, sense of safety, and ability to form healthy relationships in adulthood. Treatment options, such as therapy and support groups, are available to help adult children of alcoholics (ACOAs) heal and develop healthy coping mechanisms.

Unpredictable and unreliable environment

An alcoholic parent can create an unpredictable and unreliable environment for their children, which can have a significant impact on their mental health and development. This unstable environment can lead to feelings of uncertainty, shame, and confusion for the child, as they may never fully understand the concept of good or bad role models.

Children in these situations may also experience a sense of unpredictability and fear, never knowing when their alcoholic parent might lash out at them or when their next meal will be. This can cause them to feel trapped and unable to escape the pain caused by their parent’s addiction to alcohol. Children may blame themselves for their unmet needs, which can lead to feelings of shame and unworthiness. In addition, increased difficulties in academic and social settings can be the result of this kind of environment.

The impact of growing up in such an environment can last well into adulthood, with many adult children of alcoholics (ACOAs) struggling with symptoms of PTSD, including flashbacks, nightmares, and psychological triggers that remind them of their traumatic experiences. They may also develop other mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, and social phobias due to the unpredictable home environment they grew up in.

The need for control exhibited by ACOAs may also create problems in their relationships, as they attempt to control all aspects of their intimate relationships. They may also struggle with trust issues, finding it difficult to accept love and care from others due to their early experiences of unreliable caregivers.

The unpredictable and unreliable environment created by an alcoholic parent can have far-reaching consequences for their children, affecting their sense of safety, well-being, and ability to form healthy relationships in adulthood. It is important for ACOAs to seek professional help and support to process their traumatic experiences and develop healthy coping mechanisms.

Substance use disorders

Substance use disorder (SUD) is a mental health condition characterised by a problematic pattern of substance use that affects a person's health, well-being, and quality of life. SUD can range from mild to severe, with addiction being the most severe form. It is a treatable condition, and help is available.

The symptoms and effects of SUD vary depending on the type of substance used. The two main groups of symptoms are intoxication and withdrawal. Intoxication refers to the immediate and short-term effects of the substance, including feelings of sleepiness, calmness, excitement, or intense emotions. It can also impact judgement, decision-making, and physical and mental functioning. Withdrawal symptoms occur when the substance leaves the body and can include nausea, vomiting, diarrhoea, sweating, sleep difficulties, muscle cramping, and mood changes.

SUD can run in families, and certain genes may be risk factors. Environmental factors, such as stress or trauma, can also contribute to the development of SUD. Additionally, individuals with mental health disorders may be more likely to develop SUD as they may use substances as a form of self-medication. However, it is important to note that having a mental health disorder does not necessarily cause SUD, and vice versa.

Children of alcoholic parents are at an increased risk of developing SUD. This may be due to a combination of genetic predisposition, exposure to substance use, and using substances as a maladaptive coping mechanism to deal with traumatic experiences. The unstable and unpredictable environment created by alcoholic parents can lead to trust issues, anxiety, and a heightened desire to avoid conflict in adulthood.

Treating SUD often involves behavioural therapies, such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT), which help individuals develop healthy coping mechanisms and improve their relationships. It is important to address both SUD and any co-occurring mental health disorders simultaneously to ensure effective treatment.

Long-term mental health effects

A parent's alcohol use disorder (AUD) can have a significant impact on a child's mental health that can last well into adulthood. Children of alcoholic parents are at a higher risk of developing PTSD due to the unstable and unpredictable environment they grow up in. The specific symptoms and their severity will vary from person to person, but there are some common long-term mental health effects that have been observed.

Hypervigilance

Hypervigilance is a common symptom of PTSD and anxiety disorders. It involves a heightened state of awareness and sensitivity to one's surroundings, which can be distracting and excessive. This heightened awareness can make individuals perceive threats even when they are not present, such as interpreting a well-intentioned suggestion as criticism. Hypervigilance can develop as a self-protective coping mechanism in response to the shame and pain experienced during childhood.

Need for Control

Growing up in an unpredictable environment with alcoholic parents can lead to an extreme focus on controlling one's own behaviour and the behaviour of others. This need for control can create problems in intimate relationships as the individual may try to control all aspects of the relationship.

Difficulty with Emotions

Children of alcoholic parents may learn to hide their emotions, particularly negative ones such as sadness, anger, embarrassment, frustration, or shame. They may struggle with expressing their emotions in a healthy way, which can impact their well-being and relationships.

Trust Issues

The unpredictable behaviour of alcoholic parents can lead to trust issues that persist into adulthood. Children may feel that they cannot depend on their parents to meet their basic needs, and this sense of uncertainty can carry over into other relationships.

Substance Use Disorders

Children of alcoholic parents are at an increased risk of developing substance use disorders themselves. This can be due to a combination of genetic factors, normalization of unhealthy drinking habits, and using substances as a maladaptive coping mechanism to deal with traumatic memories.

Depression and Anxiety

Studies have found that children of alcoholics have a higher risk of developing major depressive disorder and persistent depressive disorder, as well as anxiety disorders such as general anxiety disorder, agoraphobia, and social phobia. The constant stress, fear, and guilt associated with living with an alcoholic parent can contribute to the development of these mental health disorders.

The long-term mental health effects of growing up with an alcoholic parent can be complex and vary depending on individual factors. However, it is important to recognize that these effects can persist into adulthood and that healing often requires professional help and support.

Trauma and abuse

Children of alcoholic parents are exposed to an unstable and unpredictable home environment, which can be a source of complex trauma. This can include emotional abuse, physical abuse, and neglect. The impact of this trauma can lead to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and other mental health issues that may persist into adulthood.

The unpredictable nature of alcoholism can cause children to feel unsafe and uncertain in their own homes. They may experience fear, guilt, and a lack of control, which are all factors that contribute to the development of PTSD. When basic needs are not met, children may blame themselves, leading to feelings of shame and low self-esteem. This can result in difficulties with academic and social settings, as well as an increased risk of substance use disorders later in life.

The constant stress and anxiety associated with having an alcoholic parent can also lead to the development of PTSD. Children may internalize harmful beliefs, such as feeling responsible for their parent's drinking or believing that they must take care of everyone around them. They may struggle with emotions, particularly negative ones, and learn to hide their true feelings. This difficulty in expressing emotions can lead to further complications in relationships and social interactions.

The need for control is another common symptom exhibited by children of alcoholic parents. Growing up in an uncontrollable environment can lead to an extreme focus on controlling their own behavior and the behavior of those around them. This need for control can create problems in intimate relationships, as they may struggle with trust or relinquishing control.

Hypervigilance is also a common trait, where children become highly sensitive to potential threats, even when they are not present. This heightened state of awareness can be a result of feeling the need to protect oneself from danger at a young age.

The impact of growing up with an alcoholic parent can last well into adulthood, and it is important to recognize that professional help is often required to heal from these traumatic experiences. Therapy and support groups can be effective in addressing the signs of trauma and developing healthy coping mechanisms.

Treatment and therapy

The unpredictable behaviour of an alcoholic can lead to an unstable and traumatic environment for children, which may result in the development of PTSD. Treatment and therapy can help individuals who grew up in alcoholic households to overcome their trauma and PTSD.

Therapy Approaches

Therapy can help individuals with PTSD caused by alcoholic parents to learn new skills for coping, process their history of trauma, and move forward into a healthier life. Specific therapy approaches can be tailored to match the patient's personal situation and unique characteristics. Some therapy approaches include:

• Talk therapy: One-on-one talk therapy or group counselling can help patients address the signs of trauma and develop new, healthy coping mechanisms.
• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT): CBT can help adults with PTSD discover new ways to cope with overwhelming emotions.
• Dual diagnosis: For those struggling with both PTSD and substance abuse, dual diagnosis can address the underlying causes of addiction, leading to holistic recovery.
• Somatic experiencing: This approach can help patients address the signs of trauma and develop new coping mechanisms.
• EMDR: EMDR is another effective method for addressing trauma and improving coping skills.

Steps to Healing

The following steps can help adult children of alcoholics move beyond the pain caused by their alcoholic parents:

• Assessment: Make an honest assessment of your personality, flaws, thoughts, and behaviours. Ask yourself how your childhood experiences are affecting your present life.
• Understanding: Gain a sense of clarity and understanding by viewing your struggle with PTSD in the context of your total life experience.
• Reframing: Reframe internalised flawed beliefs to regain control of your life and start moving in a positive direction.
• Professional help: Seek professional help to receive support and guidance in your healing journey.

Support Services

If you or someone you know is struggling with PTSD or other mental health issues related to alcoholic parents, there are support services available:

• SAMHSA's National Helpline: A free, confidential referral and information service for individuals and families facing mental health and substance use disorders. Available 24/7 via call or text message.
• Alateen: A youth support group that provides emotional support and resources for teens with parents who abuse alcohol or drugs.

Frequently asked questions