Confronting Alcoholism: A Family Intervention Guide

Alcoholism is a serious condition that can have destructive effects on the lives of those suffering from it and their loved ones. It is a fatal illness that requires professional help, and families often have to intervene to get their loved ones the help they need. Enabling an addict or alcoholic is detrimental to their recovery, and families must set boundaries and stop enabling behaviour. Interventions are a means to take action and improve the situation, and they can be casual or formal. A casual intervention involves bringing up a loved one's alcohol use in conversation, while a formal intervention is a planned event that usually involves a third party, such as a mental health professional. Brief interventions usually take place in a medical setting, where a doctor assesses drinking habits and provides treatment options. Seeking professional guidance is crucial, and organisations like the Association of Intervention Specialists (AIS) offer resources and referrals to specialists. SAMHSA's National Helpline is a free, confidential service that provides referrals to treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organisations.

Seek professional advice

Seeking professional advice is a crucial step in planning an intervention for a family member struggling with alcoholism. It is important to recognise that addiction is a complex issue that requires expertise to effectively address. While it may be tempting to rely solely on the advice of well-meaning friends, colleagues, or neighbours, they are not experts in addiction and may not provide accurate guidance.

Professional interventionists, such as those certified by the Association of Intervention Specialists (AIS), have the necessary training and experience to navigate the complexities of addiction. They can provide valuable insight into the behaviours associated with alcoholism and guide families in developing effective strategies. These specialists can help families understand the importance of setting boundaries and empowering the affected individual to take responsibility for their recovery.

Involving a professional ensures that the intervention is conducted in a structured and organised manner. They can assist in identifying the specific issues that need to be addressed and facilitate a conversation that encourages the individual to recognise the impact of their alcohol abuse. This can include helping the family to adopt a more empowering perspective, shifting away from codependency and enabling behaviours that may inadvertently prolong the addiction.

Professional interventionists can also provide referrals to appropriate treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organisations. They are well-versed in the available resources and can help families navigate the often complex process of finding suitable care. This may include recommending dual-diagnosis treatment centres, personalised treatment plans, and financial options to ensure accessibility.

Additionally, mental health professionals can play a vital role in the intervention process. They can provide valuable insight into the psychological aspects of addiction and co-occurring mental health disorders. By addressing these underlying issues, the intervention is more likely to be successful and lead to lasting behavioural changes.

It is important to remember that each situation is unique, and a professional interventionist will be able to tailor their approach to the specific needs of the family and the individual struggling with alcoholism. By seeking professional advice, families can increase the likelihood of a positive outcome and provide their loved one with the best chance for recovery.

Change the family's enabling behaviours

Changing a family's enabling behaviours is a crucial aspect of an intervention for an alcoholic family member. Enabling behaviours refer to actions that inadvertently allow the addiction to continue or even worsen. Families often enable their loved ones due to a sense of responsibility and the fear that without their help, the person will not be able to take care of themselves.

To change these enabling behaviours, families must first recognise and accept that they have been enabling the addiction. This involves identifying specific actions or behaviours that have contributed to the problem. For example, providing financial support that enables the person to purchase alcohol, making excuses for their behaviour, or covering up for them at work or school.

Once these enabling behaviours are identified, the family must commit to stopping them. This may involve setting clear boundaries and enforcing consequences. For instance, if the person misses work due to drinking, the family should not provide an alibi but instead, encourage them to take responsibility and face the natural consequences of their actions.

It is also essential that families seek professional guidance. Addiction is a complex issue, and experts in the field can provide valuable insight and strategies. Professional interventionists or counsellors can help families understand the root causes of their enabling behaviours and develop healthier coping mechanisms. They can also assist in creating a structured plan for the intervention, increasing the chances of success.

During the intervention, it is important to approach the conversation in a non-judgemental and supportive manner. Instead of focusing on the past and how the person's drinking has hurt others, the discussion should centre around the benefits of changing their drinking habits. This is known as "motivational interviewing", where the individual is encouraged to explore their own reasons for wanting to make a change.

Finally, the family must be prepared to follow through with their commitment to stop enabling. This may involve making difficult decisions, such as refusing to provide financial support or setting firm boundaries. It is crucial that the family remains united in their decision to stop enabling, even if the person chooses not to seek treatment. By changing their enabling behaviours, the family can play a pivotal role in helping their loved one confront their addiction and take steps towards recovery.

Plan the intervention

Planning an intervention for a loved one struggling with alcohol use disorder (AUD) can be challenging, but it is a powerful way to show support and encourage them to seek help. Here is a step-by-step guide to help you prepare:

Choose the Right Team:

Involve only those family members and close friends whom your loved one trusts and respects. It is important to keep the group small, as your loved one is more likely to become defensive or feel attacked if faced with a large group. Ensure that everyone involved is committed to helping and supporting your loved one, rather than simply expressing their own hurt or frustration.

Seek Professional Guidance:

Contact a professional interventionist, counsellor, or mental health worker with experience in addiction interventions. Organisations like the Association of Intervention Specialists (AIS) and Family First Interventions can provide referrals to qualified professionals. A professional can guide you in planning the intervention and may also facilitate the process, increasing the chances of a successful outcome.

Set Clear Goals:

Determine what you hope to achieve from the intervention. Are you encouraging your loved one to cut back on drinking or quit alcohol completely? Setting clear goals will help you measure the success of the intervention and guide your next steps.

Choose the Right Time and Place:

Select a time when your loved one is sober and ensure they are available and undistracted. Mornings may be a good time to catch them sober, and you can suggest meeting for coffee or breakfast. Choose a private, comfortable location where your loved one will feel safe and supported.

Prepare What You'll Say:

Share your observations about their drinking habits without being judgemental. For example, you can talk about changes you've noticed or how their drinking has affected their life and relationships. Use "I" statements to express your concerns, such as "I've noticed you've been drinking more frequently, and I'm worried about your health." Avoid blaming or shaming, and focus on encouraging them to seek help.

Have a Treatment Plan Ready:

Before the intervention, research treatment options and have a plan in place. Contact your insurance provider to understand your coverage for addiction treatment facilities or ask about sliding-scale fees. If your loved one agrees to seek help, you want to be able to take immediate action and guide them towards the next steps.

Remember, the goal of an intervention is to help your loved one recognise the impact of their drinking and motivate them to accept treatment. By planning carefully and involving professionals, you can increase the chances of a positive outcome.

Choose the right time

When planning an intervention, it is important to choose the right time to maximize its potential success. Interventions are a means to take action to improve a situation and help families see a way forward. It is important to remember that the family is not alone in this situation and that they should seek professional guidance.

Firstly, forget the idea of dramatic interventions, where a group of people surprises the person struggling with their alcohol use. This may increase the individual's resistance and defensiveness, and they are more likely to get defensive if they feel ganged up on. Instead, it is best to start a conversation where you are on their team and express your support without judgement. It is also important to remember that the goal is to encourage them to get help and not to launch into how their drinking hurts you. This can be done by sharing what you have noticed about their drinking and asking open-ended questions to help them find their own reasons to change. This is called motivational interviewing.

If you are unsure when your loved one drinks, it is a good idea to hold the intervention first thing in the morning so that everyone is sober. You can suggest meeting for coffee or breakfast and ensure that they have the time available. It is also important to arrange childcare if needed so that the conversation is not interrupted.

It is also worth noting that interventions can be informal, formal, or brief. An informal intervention involves casually bringing up your loved one's alcohol use and asking them questions or telling them about changes you have noticed. A formal intervention is a planned event and usually involves a third party, such as a mental health professional. This may be a good option if your loved one has a serious drinking problem and has refused help in the past. A brief intervention usually takes place in a medical setting, where a doctor will assess drinking habits and provide treatment options.

Overall, choosing the right time for an intervention involves considering the individual's sobriety, utilizing a supportive approach, and determining the appropriate intervention type based on the severity of the drinking problem and their willingness to accept help.

Avoid a big group

Interventions are a means to take action to improve a situation. Families often expect their loved one to ask for help, which they are unable to do. The family may also be in denial about the extent of the problem and the need for professional help. It is important to remember that addiction is a fatal illness and that experts should be consulted.

An intervention can be a powerful tool to help an individual suffering from alcohol use disorder (AUD) to recognize the destructive nature of their behaviour and encourage them to seek treatment. However, a large group can be intimidating and off-putting for the person suffering from AUD. A big group may also reduce the effectiveness of the intervention by increasing the individual's resistance and defensiveness.

The goal of an intervention is to encourage the individual to seek help. A large group may be counterproductive to this goal, as the individual may feel attacked or overwhelmed. It is important to remember that the individual is more likely to get defensive if they feel they are being judged or confronted.

Instead, it is recommended to only involve a small group of people who the individual respects and feels comfortable with. This could include family members and close friends. The intervention should be approached in a supportive and non-judgmental manner, with the focus on encouraging the individual to recognize the impact of their drinking habits and find their own reasons to change.

If you are unsure about how to proceed, it is advisable to seek professional help. A qualified interventionist or mental health provider who specializes in addictive behaviours can guide you through the process and increase the chances of a successful intervention.

Frequently asked questions