
In the US, there are 11 million children under the age of 18 living with at least one alcoholic parent. Growing up in a household with alcoholic parents can have a significant impact on children, leading to various cognitive, behavioral, psychosocial, and emotional consequences. Children may struggle with self-image, social comparison, positive and negative feedback, and boundaries. They may also experience anxiety, depression, antisocial behavior, and relationship difficulties. As a result, children with alcoholic parents might choose to confide in their peers or other trusted adults about their home life.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Number of children affected | In the US, there are 11 million children under the age of 18 living with at least one alcoholic parent. About one in 10 children lives with a parent who has an alcohol use disorder, and about one in 5 adults lived with a person who used alcohol when they were growing up. |
| Impact on children | Children may see first-hand how alcohol affects relationships, be exposed to violence, or experience uncertainty about where their next meal is coming from. They may feel unsafe, trapped, or unable to escape the pain caused by their parent's addiction. Children may also blame themselves, leading to feelings of shame and unworthiness. |
| Long-term effects | Children of alcoholic parents can experience symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in adulthood, including hypervigilance, a need for control, difficulty with emotions, and low self-esteem. They may also struggle with self-image, confidence, social comparison, positive and negative feedback, boundaries, self-doubt, and accepting help. |
| Increased risk | Children with alcoholic parents have an increased risk for substance use and PTSD themselves. They are four times more likely to develop an alcohol use disorder (AUD). |
| Trust issues | Children from alcoholic households may develop serious trust issues, as they have grown up in an atmosphere where denial, lying, and keeping secrets were the norm. This can lead to difficulties in establishing trusting, healthy relationships. |
| Academic and cognitive effects | Children with alcoholic parents can suffer from low grade point averages (GPAs), grade retention or failed grades, failure to pursue secondary education, and poor performance in math, reading, and spelling. |
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What You'll Learn
- Children may experience feelings of shame and unworthiness due to unmet needs
- Kids may blame themselves and wonder if they caused their parent's drinking
- Children can develop serious trust issues and struggle with relationships
- Kids may exhibit anxiety, depression, and behavioural issues
- Children are more likely to develop an alcohol use disorder

Children may experience feelings of shame and unworthiness due to unmet needs
In the US, there are 11 million children under the age of 18 living with at least one alcoholic parent. When a parent is preoccupied with maintaining their dependency on alcohol, they often fail to meet their child's basic needs. These needs include nutrition, safety, education, structure, consistency, affection, and healthcare. If these basic needs are not met, households (many of which are fraught with alcohol abuse) can become chaotic and unpredictable. Children may witness first-hand how alcohol affects relationships, be exposed to violence, or not know where their next meal is coming from.
An unpredictable and unreliable environment can cause a child to feel unsafe in their own home. They may feel trapped and unable to escape the pain caused by their parent's addiction to alcohol. Children may blame themselves for their needs not being met, which can lead to feelings of shame and unworthiness.
Children who grow up in alcoholic households often experience some form of childhood trauma, including physical or emotional abuse, neglect, abandonment, witnessing violence, and homelessness. They may be overtly told that they are bad, stupid, inadequate, unlovable, or the cause of their family's problems. As a result, they may internalize these beliefs and feel shame and unworthiness.
Children of alcoholic parents may also develop a negative self-image and low self-esteem due to the invalidation and rejection they experience. They may feel ashamed and believe that they are flawed or unlovable. These feelings can persist into adulthood, and adult children of alcoholics may continue to struggle with feelings of shame and unworthiness.
The impact of growing up with an alcoholic parent can manifest in various ways, including difficulties handling intense emotions, relationship issues, insecurity, and antisocial behaviors. Many adult children of alcoholics struggle with trust issues and may find it challenging to form healthy, intimate relationships. They may also exhibit signs of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and have an increased risk of developing an alcohol use disorder (AUD) themselves.
It is important to recognize that children of alcoholic parents are not to blame for their parents' dysfunction. Seeking support from therapists or other mental health professionals with experience dealing with addiction can be beneficial in processing and overcoming feelings of shame and unworthiness.
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Kids may blame themselves and wonder if they caused their parent's drinking
Kids may blame themselves and wonder if they caused their parents' drinking
Children of parents with alcohol use disorder (AUD) can often feel a sense of self-blame and wonder if they are the cause of their parents' drinking. This is especially true if the parent was angry or blamed them, or if the child feels that their needs are not being met. It is important for these children to understand that they are not responsible for their parents' drinking and that they cannot control or cure the problem. Seeking support from groups like Al-Anon/Alateen or therapy can help them cope with these difficult emotions.
Children of alcoholic parents may also struggle with low self-esteem, self-image issues, and feelings of shame and unworthiness. They may feel trapped and unable to escape the pain caused by their parent's addiction. These children often mature at an accelerated pace and may take on a caregiver role for their siblings or even their parents. The unpredictable and unreliable environment can cause them to feel unsafe in their own homes.
The normalization of unhealthy drinking habits within the family can also impact children's self-perception. They may struggle with confidence, social comparison, positive and negative feedback, boundaries, self-doubt, and accepting help. As a result, they may develop symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in adulthood, including hypervigilance, a need for control, difficulty with emotions, and low self-esteem.
In addition, children of alcoholic parents are at an increased risk of developing substance use disorders themselves. They may also exhibit anxiety, depression, antisocial behaviour, relationship difficulties, and behavioural issues. The impact of growing up in an alcoholic household can cause long-term emotional and behavioural consequences that may persist into adulthood.
It is crucial for children of alcoholic parents to understand that they are not to blame for their parents' drinking and that seeking support from therapists or support groups can help them cope with the challenges they face.
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Children can develop serious trust issues and struggle with relationships
Children of alcoholic parents can develop serious trust issues and struggle with relationships. They may blame themselves for their parents' drinking and feel ashamed and unworthy. This can lead to low self-esteem and a fear of angry people, causing them to avoid conflict and struggle with romantic relationships. They may also have difficulty forming trusting, healthy relationships and experience insecurity and antisocial behaviours.
Children of alcoholic parents can struggle with boundaries, self-doubt, and accepting help. They may also have difficulty distinguishing between good and bad role models, feeling conflicted and confused when they realise that drinking is not considered normal in other families. This can lead to feelings of self-consciousness and trust issues. They may also struggle with positive and negative feedback, social comparison, and confidence.
The social acceptability of alcohol can make it difficult for children to distinguish between good and bad role models. They may see their parents or other adults drinking and socialising, which can normalise alcohol use and make it confusing when they experience the negative consequences of their parents' drinking. This can lead to trust issues and difficulty forming healthy relationships.
Children of alcoholic parents may also struggle with their own substance use. They are four times more likely to develop an alcohol use disorder (AUD) themselves and may have difficulty controlling their alcohol intake. This can further impact their relationships and ability to form healthy connections.
The impact of growing up with an alcoholic parent can last into adulthood, with many people experiencing symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and struggling with relationships and emotions. Therapy and support groups can help people who have grown up with alcoholic parents to work through their trauma and improve their relationships.
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Kids may exhibit anxiety, depression, and behavioural issues
Children of parents with alcohol use disorder (AUD) can suffer from a wide range of cognitive, behavioural, psychosocial, and emotional consequences. The unpredictable and unreliable environment caused by a parent's alcohol addiction can cause a child to feel unsafe in their own home. They may feel trapped and unable to escape the pain caused by their parent's addiction. Children may blame themselves for their needs not being met, which can lead to feelings of shame, unworthiness, and low self-esteem.
The impact of a parent's AUD can cause children to experience or exhibit anxiety, depression, and behavioural issues. Studies have shown that children of alcoholic parents are more likely to develop anxiety disorders, with symptoms including hypervigilance, an intense need for control, and difficulty expressing emotions. Children may also experience depression, with feelings of loneliness, guilt, anger, and an inability to trust others. These negative emotions can be concealed as a defence mechanism, creating a sense of denial and further hindering the child's ability to form healthy relationships.
Behavioural issues may also arise as a result of a parent's AUD. Children may develop antisocial behaviours, such as aggression, delinquent behaviour, and substance use. They may also exhibit attention and conduct problems, with higher impulsivity and externalizing behaviours. The instability and chaos within the household can lead to an unhealthy focus on control, further impacting the child's ability to form and maintain relationships.
The consequences of parental alcohol misuse can extend beyond the child's emotional and behavioural functioning. Their ability to cope and adjust to social situations may be impaired, and they may struggle with low self-esteem, social phobia, and separation anxiety. These issues can persist into adulthood, with many adult children of alcoholics experiencing mental health problems, relationship difficulties, and substance use disorders.
It is important to note that not all children of parents with AUD will exhibit the same behaviours or experience the same consequences. While some may develop severe and persistent effects, others may experience minimal lasting effects. Early identification and intervention can significantly reduce the impact of these issues in the future.
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Children are more likely to develop an alcohol use disorder
In the US, there are approximately 11 million children under the age of 18 living with at least one alcoholic parent. When a parent is preoccupied with maintaining their alcohol dependency, they often fail to meet their child's basic needs, including nutrition, safety, education, structure, consistency, affection, and healthcare. This can cause children to feel unsafe in their own homes, and they may feel trapped and unable to escape the pain caused by their parent's addiction.
Children with alcoholic parents are at an increased risk of substance use and developing an alcohol use disorder (AUD) themselves. They are four times more likely than other children to develop an AUD. By young adulthood, 53% of these children show evidence of an alcohol or drug use disorder, compared to 25% of children whose parents do not have an AUD. This is partly because the social acceptability of alcohol makes it easy for some to develop an addiction or dependency. Additionally, genetics plays a role in the likelihood of developing alcohol and drug use disorders, so biological children of individuals with an AUD have an increased risk of developing a substance use disorder (SUD).
Children of parents with an AUD may also struggle with self-image and self-esteem issues, which can cause lifelong problems with confidence, social comparison, positive and negative feedback, boundaries, self-doubt, and accepting help. They may also experience trust issues, which can lead to difficulties in establishing healthy relationships. Other common characteristics of adult children of alcoholics include difficulties handling intensely positive and negative moods, feelings of anger or resentment toward their parents, insecurity, antisocial behaviours, and difficulty communicating with others.
The negative effects of parental AUDs on children can differ depending on the type of AUD the parent has. Previous research has found that children of parents with an AUD are at greater risk for depression, anxiety disorders, problems with cognitive and verbal skills, and parental abuse or neglect. They are also more likely to have lower socioeconomic status and increased difficulties in academic and social settings and family functioning.
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Frequently asked questions
Children who grow up in households with alcoholic parents can experience a wide range of cognitive, behavioral, psychosocial, and emotional difficulties. They are also more likely to develop an alcohol use disorder (AUD) themselves. Children may also see how alcohol affects relationships and be exposed to violence, or they may experience emotional and physical neglect.
Children of parents with alcohol abuse issues may exhibit anxiety, depression, antisocial behavior, relationship difficulties, and other behavioral issues. They may also struggle with self-image, self-esteem, and trust issues.
It is important for children to know that they are not alone and that they should not blame themselves for their parent's substance abuse. They should open up to a trusted adult or friend and seek support from a therapist or support group. Building good emotional habits, such as speaking up and expressing emotions, can also help foster healthy relationships in the future.











































